Martha Stewart recalls ‘bastard’ parole officer preventing her from hosting ‘SNL’

Martha Stewart was “pissed” her “bastard” parole officer once blocked her from hosting “Saturday Night Live” after she got out of prison.

The former “Martha Stewart Show” host appeared on the “Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” Monday when Fallon asked her if she had any interest in hosting the hit comedy show.

“I wanted to, and they asked me as I was coming out of Alderson –– that camp that I was in for awhile,” she said while Fallon laughed and buried his face in his hands.

Stewart, 83, spent five months in the early aughts in the Federal Prison Camp in Alderson, W. Va., where she served her sentence for conspiracy, obstruction of justice and making false statements to federal investigators.

“My parole officer wouldn’t give me the time to do it,” she explained. “I was allowed to be out of my house eight hours a day.”

The lifestyle entrepreneur slammed the parole officer as a “bastard” and admitted that she still remembers “his name and his number.”

Martha Stewart on the "Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon"
However, Stewart’s parole officer didn’t allow her to accept the gig.Todd Owyoung/NBC via Getty Images
Martha Stewart posing for a photo

“I’m so pissed, but maybe someday,” Stewart dreamed.

Fallon agreed and told Stewart that she’d be “fantastic” as a host.

“Oh, I would,” she quipped. “I would be amazing!”

Although Stewart has yet to host the live comedy sketch series, she has become one of the most frequently impersonated people over the years.

Martha Stewart smiling
Stewart said that she’d be an “amazing” host.Rolling Stone via Getty Images
 Rachel Dratch as Martha Stewart, Queen Latifah as Kinyata Williams on "SNL"
The television personality has been impersonated several times on the comedy show.NBCUniversal via Getty Images

Stewart has previously spoken about her experience behind bars after she was released in March 2005. In addition to her five-month sentence, she also had to spend the following five months under house arrest and the next two years under probation.

The Sports Illustrated Swimsuit model described her stay as “terrible” and specifically had a problem with the “very poor quality of the food.”

“I had to do all that crap that you see in the movies,” she said in her “Martha” documentary. “You can’t even believe that that’s what you’re going through.”

Martha Stewart leaving a courthouse in 2004
Stewart was sentenced to five months in prison for conspiracy, obstruction of justice and making false statements to federal investigators.AFP via Getty Images
Martha Stewart standing outside a courthouse
Stewart served out her sentence at Federal Prison Camp in Alderson, W. Va.WireImage